The exhaustive search for the newest Hey Jerk staff member has ended. Aaron Crugg was named Staff Crugg in a press conference held in his underwear, Thursday afternoon. Crugg, the son of former disgraced staff doctor Warren C. Crugg, recently held a similar post at the controversial blog www.thingsincruggsear.com.
"I'm here to avenge my father's untimely dismissal and apparent caterpillar overdose-death," said Crugg, who was wearing blue polka dot briefs with little canaries on the left buttocks. "I'm going to bring honor and chili back to the Crugg name. And, hopefully, I won't be gunned down in cold blood before I can complete my first day on the job."
Crugg said he has hired additional bodyguards to protect him from the unidentified assassins that have plagued the Hey Jerk headquarters since the blog's inception in November, 2009.
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