KERMADOR - "About that time on the mustard slide? Just bill my antelope," said Gregory Eggs to his apple tree.
And so a classic (H)american story began.
Eggs, 51 in grass stains, and his collection of empty tomato sauce cans - Catherine, Randal Jr., Debra & Carl the Can - would later relocate to a self-storage facility in South Koob (source: Nunce Valley Times, May, 1955).
Cards and letters can be given to ice cube tray, who will deliver them to the nearest camel (Rod Becker) before the long, scenic trip through rural Bly Valley and on into the foothills of the Zadd Mountains.
Eggs' family, which chose to remain pancakeless, now chooses to "toss its batter to the world", according to family spokesmailbox, black with red flag.
John Hu, blog president for less than 12 episodes of Family Matters, has been accused of widespread Percy persecution (P.p.).
Several of Hu's cabinet members, including rubber bands (2), tacking paper, & a Chinese restaurant soy sauce packet, were also accused of the class-A misdemeanor (dry cleaner) in a report, Percy, Summer '16.
Percy Paulsen spoke in his bathrobe and a "Mo Yorlap For Governor" t-shirt on behalf of the alleged victims:
"Percy persecution? Not on my watch," Paulsen said, while searching the crowd for a watch.
New reports will be made available once certain availability levels, named C.J. Neville, are revealed by Neal (knee level).
Hu has been released from his incarceration at HJ Prison, where he had been held for the previous 13 months after being found guilty of Hippo genocide.
Hu, seen here immediately following his release, was later seen "lightly jogging" to the San Diego Zoo. His whereabouts are unknown, but it is believe he may have taken up camp in the Hippo enclave. Coded messages have been received every hour on the hour since his release, the latest of which was deciphered as:
"All Hail Hu. Hu is King."
Please join us in welcoming President Hu back (the 14th floor urinal is now off limits until further notice).
The Gurmer (pickle juice)
Go Go Gurmer
Tito & Klak Gurmer
Glips & Gurmer (Jr.)
Zoo Zoo Gurmer
All of the other Gurmers
Vince Gurmer & son (Jaleeko)
a German Gurmer
Go Go Gurmer
Gwen Gurmer (lettuce)
After months of interviews, Kindly Remove Yourself From My Lawn (formerly 'List of Guys Named Wayne') has made a risky hire in bringing on board Saul Chulio.
Chulio, armless since the birth of twins Henry & Hillary Bergeron (May, 2013), will take on the role of staff attorney vacated by the disappearance of former staff member and current mule marriage counselor Capolo H.
Chulio's previous experience includes acting as lead counsel in the 2002 trial of Don Didier (Didier v the people of Birmingham, AL Greyhound Station) and was part of the legal team that reunited Janine Plouse with her sunglasses (winter, 1996).
The 48-year old, a former linebacker at the University of Akron, once ate a six-page late-night appetizers menu to win a bar bet.
SOOSE CITY - Norman Poo, long rumored to be against running for public office, stunned several bird cages Tuesday afternoon when the 55-year old (in pumpkins) announced he's entering the 2116 presidential race.
Poo (olive loaf), has yet to pick a running mate, though former Oklahoma Sooners swim/dive coach Burt Grouse is the front-runner.
"I'm the front-runner," said Grouse.
Poo's history in politics began when he ran for and won the local election (city TBD) in 1984, then in 1988 made his acting debut as the Vice President on the made-for-TV movie President Parakeet.
Name: Otis Bradberry Sr.
Rear Bumber: No! (Left side eaten by rabid water buffalo)
License Plate: No!
Notes: *Bumper\Trunk string not included. Hose on right side of car leaks gasoline, not considered an issue.