December 8, 2020

2020 Mule Draft - Round 1

First round picks by Al F. (odd picks), and Terry (even)

1) Ottawa - Dan Devito Jr., Derwood Tech. Highlights: Ate a Kent whole (October '77), farted 412 times in a period of less than one minute (1998), Husband to Daniel Devito Sr. 

2) Conyers - Filles, Emanuel, Derwood Tech. Highlights: none

3) Otis County - Horace, Norwood, Derwood State. Highlights: Sharted at second base during the 7th inning of the Otis County Little League World Series, was removed from the game and beaten close to death. Wife of Bob Feathers. 

4) San Antonio - Jenny Bix, Texas A&M. Highlights: completed Highlights magazine - dentist office July 16, 1988. Pointed at a mailbox for 11 minutes, 22 seconds (Henrick County record).

5) Cleveland - Booby, Cleveland, N/A. Highlights: Fell into a sewer June, 1988, lived there for 11 years. The Perez family lived in Mr. Booby's anal for a period of 17 years (1988-2005), at which point they were evicted, and subsequently convicted, for dingleberry theft. 

6) Vinny Valley - Yeimin Zeck, Middle Georgia College. Uncle: J.J. (b. 1922, d. 1976). Point guard, New Jersey Nets. 0.2 ppg, 0.2 rpg, 0.2 apg, 0.2 apg, 0 epg.

7) Devito Penitentiary - 09738 42.3, Brian Gregory Tech. Highlights: Inmate Daryl Doof was the first human to attempt and succeed in eating an elephant whole. 09738 42.3 is known for their bowel movement skills (Bronze, 194 Olympic Games)

8) Louisville - J.T. Schmidt, Iowa State mens tennis. Walnuts: 4.

9) New York Knicks: Mule, Muleford - N/A. Highlights: Orville Knuggins.

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