Wally Werner: Located

Initial reports coming out of Hong Kong have enthusiasts hopeful that Wally Werner, once famous aardvark enthusiast, has at long last been located after decades of despair.

WARNING: PHOTO CONTAINS GRAPHIC IMAGES


Photo (Click for Larger View)

The photo, taken by innocent bystander Saul Fotto, is believed to show Werner navigating the treacherous streets of Cleveland, Ohio. Lead investigator Don Didier believes this to be the conclusive evidence he has been seeking since the Werner Explosions of 1906.

"We believe this proves that Walter Egnacio Werner is, in fact, alive and well - despite reports to the contrary. An APB has been released for the capture and kill of Mr. Werner, effective yesterday at 6 PM EST."

In other, somewhat shocking news, an alien aircraft appears to have crashed on the west side of Cleveland. Further developments will be shared as they become available.

- Staff Idiot Bobby Derwood