J. Scott, who was expected to play first base and bat sixth or not at all for the Hey Jerk Coolies, has been cut, according to manager Pupu Quimm.
Scott, who hit .093 for the 2011 Coolies and also owns four short-sleeve dress shirts, was seen outside Coolie Park insulting a water fountain when Quimm broke the news.
To fill the roster spot, general manager Glenn M. has announced the team has purchased the contract of Malik Ruuso from the Independent Horace League. Ruuso was the league's coughing champion in 2006 and 2007, and during the league's 2010 all-star weekend drank an entire bottle of shampoo to win the skills challenge.
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