From: Amechi Best Nwaohia show details - Oct 22
This message is to inform you of your eligiblity as a winner of the sum of 750,000.00 Pounds on the on going swiss lotto international draw. contact Barr. Leonard Scott Via e-mail : deskof.lscott@yahoo.com.hk. Phone : +44 702 405 8502 with your details : 1.Name 2.Occupation 3.Home address 4.Age 5.Mobile Number. 6. Country . 7.Nationality.Online Coordinator : Amechi Best.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
Not interested.
Reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
well, get interested. this is a great opportunity for you and your family.
Reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
I don't have a family, I'm an aardvark.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
aardvarks have families, too. You have a family. A family of aardvarks.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
No, I don't. I'm an aardvark with a unibrow; an unattractive aardvark.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
settle down. collect the 75,000 pounds or someone else will. - Rory Rainbow
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
Rory? Who the hell is Rory? I only know P.F. Oscar Rainbow-Jickson
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
that name is false. My name is Oscar Rainbow, but on Mondays I go by my mailman-given name, Rory.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
Okay Rory. Hope you work a good route today. Heard the Yarboroughs may have left the dog unleashed again.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
I didn't say I was a mailman. I said it was my mailman-given name. A mailman gave it to me during the war (on expired potato salad during my grocery store cashier days).
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
Thanks for the story, Rory. I think I'm going to go lick myself for a while and have a walnut.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
you shouldn't always say everything you're thinking. that's my advice for the day.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
well your advice stinks, sir. Worse than my doo. I'm in the market for a pine cone tree, if ya got one. Yellow.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
only have red. and it's not for sale. good luck finding one in yellow, jerk.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
alright, fine. you have any arugula?
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
yeah, too much. how much you looking to get?
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
Four shoogels. Willing to pay 7 dollars per.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
what the hell is a shoogel, sir? I think you may have sent this to the wrong email address.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
A shoogel is 4.3 kilos of arugala. We gonna barter or what?
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
no, we're not, because you just made up a word and assigned it a unit of measure. That's not how I do business sir.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
You aren't a businessman. You're a homeless, retired U.P.S. driver.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
I'm a truck-less UPS driver and retired homeless man. get it right.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
I'm out of shampoo. Got any available?
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
I've only got enough to last me for the next week and I'm washing a whole bunch of heads today and tomorrow.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
You're a hair dresser?
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
No. just offering it to anyone who is in a hurry and forgot to shampoo. I have a stand in my drive way.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
great.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
it would be great if my neighbor, Sal, would stop drinking all of the shampoo. I said one time, 'yeah, Sal, you can have one shot.' Now the guy is coming over four, five times a day, puts on disguises....it's scaring off potential clients.
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
I have to make things in the bathroom.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
Spaghetti?
reply from c.compelio@gmail.com
no, stinky things.
reply from oscarrainbow@gmail.com
good day, sir.
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