September 14, 2012

Shermer Passes

Aldis Shermer, "the man who ate a potato and bathed in a pool of front lawn in the 70s", has died of potato overdose, according to a Harriet Leonard with knowledge of the situation.

Shermer, who had a Maylow County-record four belly buttons, played for and scored four goals for the Chicago Blackhawks from 1988-1994, then married a piece of grilled salmon in May, 2006, was four months away from retiring as the mayor of IshMish, Maryland.

Funeral services are scheduled for September 22 at 4:00 p.m. Harolds and Danielles will be served.


- Staff correspondent J.J. Jaboo

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