ELIMINATE THE CENTRAL TIME ZONE!

Fans,

Please pledge your support to oscarrainbow@gmail.com for our efforts here at the Jerk to eliminate the Central Time Zone altogether. We fine it unnecessary and quite frankly, evil. Note the conversation editor Capolo had with a co-worker yesterday:

Wendell Cinnamon: CST is better. EST people don't show up to work til 9. The day is half over by then

Capolo: No. it has no identity. Its just there, in the middle of the country, screaming "Who am I?"

Wendell Cinnamon: (Starting to lose mind) EST people think only EST should exist. that is the arrogance that i can't stand

Capolo: I think any normal person would agree with my standpoint

Wendell Cinnamon: (Foaming at the mouth) People you define as normal are morons to CST people

Capolo: I'll start a coalition: "Eliminate the Central Time Zone." I'll have a large following

Wendell Cinnamon: You and your army of one: your mommy

Capolo: My mother was in the army in the 40's and Id rather not discuss it, but thank you for bringing up a sore subject

Wendell Cinnamon: So your mom is llike 85? Creepy

Capolo: That isn't your business

As you can see, the CST and its inhabitants clearly need to be eliminated. Please pledge us your support in 2012 so that we can attack this challenge "head on" (literally, head first.)