Finally, a New Hire

After what seemed like "millenia" (Grugg Fimpway, 1864 - "The Volleyball Crisis in Late 19th Century Northern America"), The Jerk has finally made another hire. Desperately in need of a Staff Crotch Sniffer, The Jerk made a monumentous hire today in bringing on Giraffe Rainbow (no relation to other Rainbows on staff).

Rainbow

Rainbow, who comes with over 47 years of crotch sniffing experience, is widely considered a pioneer in his field. He coined the term "Undercarriage Disaster" after a job in southern France in the late 1950's. He is also widely known for his curious methods, which include sticking straws in his nostrils immediately before the sniffing session is to begin.

Please join us in welcoming Giraffe to the family.

- Staff Crotch Correspondent Trent Bibswitch