Venton Bogoba, a member of the prominent Bogoba family, has been hired as staff waver. Bogoba will be responsible for waving at passing motorists, floral arrangements and new staff banister, Don Menkley.
The Bogoba File
Age: N/A
Family: pine cone (Dwayne), marble (Betsy), daughter (Pinecone)
Military history:
1984-1986: soldier in the War of Many Salads. Wounded by cabbage schrapnel and received honorable discharge in May, 1986.
1988: captain of the 7th infantry in Pinch War of '88. Had eleven pinches in Mexico City (June, 1988)
1996-2006: lieutenant in United States giant ear core. Fought in several conflicts, including the Battle to Maintain Paul Paulfield's Hairpiece and the Asparagus Misunderstandings of '03. Retired from military service in December, 2006.
Work experience:
1972-1975: Salesman at Hank's Bait & Tackle Shop. Fired, January, 1975 for improper use of a dip bait.
1976-1977: Agent for child star Casey Iris. Fired and briefly imprisoned in November, 1977 for theft of sneakers.
1979-1982: Revising resume
1983: Power forward for the Richburg Torpedos basketball team. Released in February, 1983 after contract dispute/alleged referee kidnapping.
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