XAVIER COUNTY - Big news from below the mashed potato line as the Jerk has announced the hiring of Ardis Bryson as Staff Wendell. Bryson, the brother of Bill Bryson, will be responsible for Wendell-related activities, including finding lost Wendells and making the blog's world-famous Wendell Pie.
Bryson issued a statement through his washing machine, Darryl:
"Coolie Itch in '90."
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