November 29, 2010

Jones Passes Away



Oboe Jones, who was hired in late-July as staff orchestra, died in a violin fire early Monday. Jones, 62, was attempting to reunite a violin with its estranged mother when the string instruments caught on fire. Jones, who wasn't liked by anyone on staff, was eating a fingernail sandwich at the time and didn't see the flames.

Instead of funeral services, we're just going to go about our business like Oboe Jones was never hired in the first place. His dart board would've wanted it that way.


- Correspondent Thom O'Day

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