Cotillion Forced out of Office, Sanchules Killed

In a move that is believed to preface something much larger in scope, Squib Cotillion has been "forcefully coerced" out of office. No camp has claimed responsibility at this hour, but it is believed that this tactical plan will be followed up by installing a new Staff President in the coming hours - by force.

"It's not right," said Cotillion, who will remain on as Staff Comedian, "I was going to change things around here. I was fighting for the little people, like Adonde Sanchules."

In what might be a related move, Staff Doctor/Sanchules Adonde Sanchules was found brutally murdered at his box under the 15th Street bridge. Similarly to the removal of Cotillion, no camp has claimed this slaying. However, it was widely known that Sanchules was a vehement Cotillion supporter, so intial reaction may be that he was slain to remove any chance of rebellion amongst the staff after the Cotillion removal from office.

Sanchules (Dead)



More to come as the night progresses.

- Staff Comedian Squib Cotillion