Lanugo Found in Spaghetti Sauce

Staff detective Richard Lanugo was found in a pot of boiling spaghetti sauce, late Monday. The temperature of the sauce was not known at press time, making the next few minutes vital to Lanugo's survival.

If Lanugo does perish by spaghetti sauce, or is mistaken for a bay leaf and eaten, Hey Jerk will have full coverage.