Since the controversial, protest ridden victory by Randy Mejito earlier this evening, several Andrew Mejito supporters have come out of hiding to voice their displeasure.
"I'm not havin' it!" exclaimed Salfonce Pepano, Staff Assassin. "Andy deserved this, and the judges robbed him! There was a clear ketchuping with intent to clog the poohole by Randy in the Third, and it wasn't called."
Shortly after, in retaliation, Sal offed Moosehead Glenn, in an apparent rage-filled, unwarranted murder. RIP Moosehead.
Moosehead Glenn
In other retaliation news, Mejito family spokesperson Yancey Mejito Jr. spoke out on the rigged election.
"The thing was rigged. Andy deserved to win that thing. Randy has worn tightie-whities his whole life and clearly put on the boxers just to win over the crowd. In addition to that, Randy's gay." Yancey indicated that Mejito family riots can be expected in the near future.
Yancey Mejito Jr.
Further post-election riot updates to come exclusively at The Jerk.
- J.J. Klecko, former Staff Nostril Man
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