Remaining Glenns Perish

After Vincenzo Pepano's mass killings of the heads of the Crugg family, early Sunday morning, the Glenn clan could finally put a stranglehold on the Hey Jerk underground avocado industry. Unfortunately, the Glenns perished when their Glennwagon exploded in mid-air just a few minutes ago, killing the heads of the avocado syndicate-Fat Neck, Abner and Petey.

Here's a photo of the Glenns boarding the Glennwagon, the first of its kind, at 8:58 p.m.



According to Hey Jerk crash correspondent Aubrey Sanchules, the crash happened at approximately 9:49 p.m. No word on whether the remaining Cruggs, Ulysses or Poseidon, had anything to do with the crash, though they did release a statement through lawyer C. Vanderells Bwon.

"Let's keep this between you and me, but they may have replaced the gasoline with soy sauce," said Bwon. "And fired several rounds of ammunition at the wagon's fuel tank shortly after take-off."