Red Shorts Start War Against Morris

A pair of red shorts (Melvin) abandoned by Lieutenant Derwood Morris have decided to wage war, according to Staff War Correspondent Melvin Manipples.

Melvin

Staff President Oscar Q. Rainbow immediately pledged his full financial and military support to the operation.

"Morris must be found, trialed, and murdered as quickly as possible." - Oscar Rainbow

Upon learning of the plight of the red shorts (Melvin), Rainbow also appointed Melvin as Staff Derwood Morris assassin.

Melvin can be found in the 4th floor east wing sitting right outside of the office of Ed Xomcheese (deceased).

- Staff Correspondent Doowoo Woodee