Blue
Blue, who famously once ate an entire elephant during the 5th inning of a Portland/San Juan ballgame, is thrilled to usher in a new era here at The Jerk.
"Oscar Rainbow will be hunted down and killed. That is my first order of business. Until this happens, I will not make any other public statements. Go Cowboys!" - Staff President Bobby Blue
Blue barricaded himself into his office on the 133rd floor east wing and hasn't been seen since being hired three weeks ago.
- Staff Correspondent Hippo Footshit