Gallego passes on

Side of Route 84 - Millions were stunned to learn that Heeko Gallego, longtime bass player for Caramelized Back Brace and advocate for same-sex leaf counting, had been eaten by his pet raccoon, Renaldo.

The two had been living together since Renaldo first arrived on the planet last May 8.

Reports have been confirmed that Renaldo did, in fact use a dijon mustard to consume his former owner.

The Gallego family (tape measure) issued the following photograph of Gallego as an infant and started the bidding at $150: