We would like to take a moment to introduce the Jerk's newest staff member and HR Manager, Ther Eis.
Eis (Deceased)
Eis, formerly of the Connecticut Sanchules Family, is to be welcomed "with open arms" by all staff members. Note, this is not to be taken literally - do not actually open your arms when you see Eis. This is considered an insult in his country, and his resulting actions are not the responsibility of "the firm". Chances of death are significant - "FYI."
Services for Eis will be as follows:
11/6 at McDonalds - The Eulogy
11/8 at the Aschermann Household - The Burial
11/10 at HJ Headquarters - Report for duty, 8 AM.
Please direct any Ther Eis related inquries to Capolo "Dominic" Henderson at capolo@yahoo.com
Thanks to all - and a very merry Easter.
- Staff Editor Donkeyface Nelson
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