Heads of the "The Fuqwa Five" found on sticks

The heads of the famous Fuqwa Five were found on sticks on the banks of the Queh River Saturday afternoon. A salmon named Murray was swimming by when he noticed the five heads and immediately called the authorities, leaf.

"I told you earlier, until I find out if my step-brother Horace was caught and eaten, or if he is, in fact, that fish swimming over there, then I have no comment," Murray said in a statement released by a mud pile.

[Fuqwa Five on sticks. By staff sketch artist Doris Zerk]

The Fuqwa Five received national notoriety in 1993 when they were nearly eaten by a grizzly bear, but instead befriended the bear and the bear, 43, later married Clarence Fuqwa. In 1998, the remaining four brothers-Pee-Po-Gee-Johng, C'Rnickieo, Ortt and Verch-formed an acoustic guitar quartet, but quickly disbanded because none of the brothers had arms.

In January, Ortt set a national record for most eyeglasses worn simultaneously (11).