Barnard Squiggleshitz has left us here on Planet Derner, passing his soft-serve ice cream at approximately 3:05 p.m. MUST (Murray Standard Time).
"Squiggey was my best friend. I'm really really going to miss him." - microwave
The former 47, 48 and 49-year old leaves behind "dozens of unopened pieces of mail" (Didier Illustrated, Vol. 13, Issue 17), an autographed picture of former New York Pecans right fielder Dominic Dom-D'Mog'io, two tickets to Ketchup On Ice and a delicious recipe for Sandpaper Pasta written on a sheet of yellow, lined paper.
"And a VHS copy of the 1977 motion picture Another Girl Named Tiffany at Tiffany's." - Pastor/Bassist Bobby Feathers
Squiggleshitz's position as staff photograph of an onion has already been filled by a video of an unidentified man stepping on an onion.
[onion] - anonymous